Time to Talk Politics

Angry Pelosi

Nancy Pelosi yelling at Donald Trump

Yup, it’s time to talk politics.  I have studiously avoided political blog posts, because I would like to think that is not the main reason anyone comes in for counseling.  And I have zero interest in changing anyone’s views on the subject.  Yet it has become so overwhelming in the past couple of years, that I feel a need to address it.  Mostly, people come into my office with whatever issues they are dealing with at the time, and those issues tend to mostly not be politically based.  By the time a client has completed whatever therapy they have come in for, I usually have no clue what that client’s political leanings are.  And that is fine.

Unfortunately, though, with the current administration, it is being reported by many therapists that their business has taken a leap due to the problems people are suffering as a result of the political fallout.  People suffering from sexual abuse problems are being triggered by constantly seeing images of a chief executive who has been credibly accused by several women of exactly that.  Those who have concerns about immigration issues are inundated with images and information about families being forcibly separated at the border, then confined in for-profit prisons with a history of abuse.  And the children involved will suffer lifelong trauma.  A number of those children will never be reunited with their parents, since there was initially not even a good system to identify which child belonged with which family.  Rising inequality has reached even greater heights than before.  The LGBTQ rights that were so hard fought for, are now under threat.  That is only a smattering of the issues, and for many these issues make day to day life much more difficult.  In a number of cases, these ongoing issues lead to huge feelings of helplessness.  At best, they are constant background noise for those of us who are outraged.  And yes, I am outraged.

When I was in graduate school, we were encouraged to avoid discussing politics with our clients.  That was post-9/11, barely; I actually started grad school one week before that attack.  So, post-9/11, but before we ever dreamed this country could face the issues we are facing today.  I grew up in somewhat of a golden era, and could not imagine that things would not continue that way indefinitely.  Consequently, I was gobsmacked.

During previous eras that involved conflict, people found ways to go on with life despite the conflicts and/or stresses, and they will do the same today.  There will be those among us who devote every spare minute to activism, others will do their best to bury their heads in the sand, and most of us will fall somewhere in between.  But it adds an extra layer of stress for just about everyone.

In the event it matters to you, you now know where I stand.  If you are asking me to cheerlead for our current administration, you have come to the wrong place.  If you want to process your own personal issues with me, you have come to the right place.  And if you are one who is bothered by today’s political scene—we will not solve that in therapy, but you can at least feel secure I the knowledge that my sympathies are with you.

Politics in Everyday Life

protest sign in crowd

protest: We Are Better…

Having grown up in a very political family, I often tried to downplay the issue of politics. Then I came to the realization that it really cannot be avoided. Moral issues tend to have a political side to them, as was present to us so dramatically in the recent crisis of immigrant children being separated from their parents at the southern border of this country. Just about every professional organization weighed in on that—including the American Psychiatric Association, the American Counseling Association, the American Psychological Association, numerous medical and pediatric associations…you name it. None of these associations exists for political purposes, but in this case there was no denying the link.
Prior to becoming licensed as an LPCC, I did my internship with adopted children who had attachment issues, which are most commonly caused by abuse or neglect in the first two or three years of life. Children with this disorder tend to be indiscriminate in who they will show affection to, many of them will tell obvious lies with a straight face, pit their parents against one another, manipulate situations, and demand control at all times simply for the sake of control. Why? Those early years are when they decide if the world is a safe place. Though all parents and caregivers make mistakes, the generally healthy pattern for an infant is that when the child cries or shows distress, at least one adult attempts to comfort that child, to meet whatever need arises, be it food, changing, or simply wanting to be held. This comfort has recently been snatched from so many of these younger migrant children.
The older children are unlikely to develop Reactive Attachment Disorder, but they will have long-lasting symptoms of Posttraumatic Stress Disorder, or PTSD. We did this to them. I don’t mean you and I individually, but we are part of the country that did this to them.
And this is very political. Very.
Though I have no intention of engaging clients in political discussions, sometimes the problems that bring them into my office have a political basis. Women’s equality, domestic abuse, GLBTQIA issues, racial and religious differences, the views of different cultures, working with the differently-abled such as children with autism or extreme Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder or with physical problems, listening to someone who is wrangling with obtaining much-needed healthcare while every other developed country has universal health care…How can this not be political?
You may go to demonstrations and call your congressional representatives or you may not. I don’t care. But I can no longer pretend that it is possible to go through life on this earth without being political in some way.
I have exactly zero interest in making any attempt to change your party affiliation or your political views. And I will hold firmly to my own, which are intricately connected to my own moral center.